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Best ways to not get caught red handed

by The Mansion | comments

What are you doing?! C’mon, get out of here!

A key unlocks the door. The door-handle starts to turn. Lights! Panic! Life seems to flash before your own eyes. Your life may not be on the line, but your social life might be. Getting caught hooking up can be one of the most agonizing experiences in life, hopefully it was worth it!

Are the clothes on or off?? Doesn’t matter, whatever objects are in the closest vicinity (blankets, pillows, lampshades, sombreros, etc.) are being grabbed to cover up whatever seems to be going on! But, not really. Can I somehow hide!? Let me jump in the closet! I’ll drop to the floor! “PINEAPPLES!” Maybe the famous words of Kevin Hart could prevent this terror! Anything to keep from getting caught! That split second decision is a tough one.

C’mon! What are you doing?! Get out! One thing is for certain, whoever is walking in holds your fate in their hands. If this person is a loud mouth, life might be over. But maybe they can keep a secret? Dude, you can’t tell anyone! It all depends; do you have something to hide…?

Who is thattt?! Is this a one night stand, a significant other, a grenade? Worse yet, ARE YOU CHEATING?! No matter what, tomorrow morning someone is hearing a funny story with your name in it. Reputations are on the line at this point…

You know what, who cares?! There’s always the option to just keep doin’ what you’re doin’! It’s natural, right? All’s fair in love and… wait, or is this lust? Whatever. It will be a good story we all laugh at down the road.

Andrew S, Fairleigh Dickinson University


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